Cows are flatulating the world towards oblivion
Dangerous things, cows.T.S. Eliot feared and distrusted them, as revealed in his recently rediscovered poem:Of all the beasts that God allows In England’s green and pleasant land I most of all dislike the cows:Their ways I do not understand.
Henry Ford, the US car magnate, considered cows the most crude and inefficient machines, and spent much of his life campaigning against them: “We don’t need cows,” he said.And now poor David Blunkett has been trampled by an irate cow in the Peak District, bringing the number of people injured by cows in Britain over the past eight years to 481.
But the real threat from cows comes not from their horns, or that creepy rolling thing they do with their eyes just before they charge, but from their digestive systems: cows are flatulating the world towards oblivion. Daisy and Buttercup may look picturesque, and taste delicious with a little Béarnaise sauce, but each cow is a living factory chimney, spewing out pollution at a quite staggering rate.
It’s a very important issue which I’ve always been surprised hasn’t been tackled before now. Like it says in the article people just don’t connect what they see as a ‘natural’ process having an impact on the environment. Plus whenever somebody brings up the issue it’s always treated as a humorous news story, rather than a serious scientific challenge which could and is being researched. Don’t like the idea of laboratory produced meat though, it might do me out of a job for a start.